I used to be that guy...
Looking back at the photographs
sometimes it's difficult to imagine
how little I remember
and I wonder if it's true
I've heard more stories
than I care to remember
but there it is trapped in the emulsion
on this paper reflecting light
an image forms
I used to be that guy
I used to be that guy
I'm not proud of it
but I won't deny it
you were my friend and
I fucked your girlfriend
she said she was your "ex"
but you were still hung up then
only a few short months out
and she came to me
on my couch giving me the eye
so I took her to bed
and she never regretted it
hours later
there you were knocking at my door
me in my boxers looking out the peephole
you obviously upset
her naked and sleeping in my bed
what would a real friend do?
open the door
or turn you away with silence?
which would hurt you less?
I can't decide
so I sit down on the couch
where I first kissed her last night
her shoes on the floor
her purse sinking between the cushions
eventually you stop knocking
and I hear your footfalls descend the stairs
I listen for the screach of tires
as you drive away
I move to the bedroom door
and stand there on the threshhold
watching her sleep contentedly
eyes flicker open
and arms stretch out
she smiles and gestures for me to return
I accept the invitation once more
it's a moment of weakness
or is it
I figure I've come this far already
might as well make the most of it
I know you are alone and crying
I know she is using me to hurt you
so I punish her with my cock
I make her want it more
but she won't ever get it again
I'm not a tough guy
just a survivor
- F. Scott Marvin, 2005
* * *
© SpiritCaller.net, 2005
| 